January 21- April comes back to town (Paris)

Dear January,

I would like to reassure you that you mean a lot to me, as the first month of the year. I might not been very present – at the blog-sphere- I know. I might have not finished my resolutions, and my update to see what progress has been made in my transformation process. What new things I have learnt. How my love life and romance has evolved.

During the holidays, I have been back to my little South of France village, where I dedicated myself to the following activities: coconing and spending time with family and neighbors. I have eaten chocolates and “galettes des rois” and have turned into a vegetable in front of holidays tv shows, don’t think of anything exotic. I have laid on the family sofa and for a change, have taken a membership card from the closest local café. I have played Playmobil with my godson Alexandre and his brother. Read fairy tales that seemed to interest me more than them.

Yes, this has been part of my adventures. After the acceleration of the rhythm just before the holidays, and the wannabe boss who put as much pressure as possible, I felt I needed to slow down a bit. Maybe a bit too much. You might consider it a form of hibernation.

That is why I start waking up, with my return to the capital. There have been some events, during my absence, very unfortunate. Hopefully, now that I am back, things will get better and everyone will adhere to the resolution of kindness, wisdom and gratitude. In any case, I feel I have a more active part to play.

I have a baby orchid plant and during the last year it has grown so much, it is falling out of the pot. I bought a bigger one, and now it has what it takes to grow better.

The same goes with me. 2015 is a year to find the conditions and ingredients for growth and well-being. It’s a promise.

April has come back to town 😉

http://www.grand-paris.jll.fr/fr/le-projet-du-grand-paris/presentation-generale/id/48

 

 

August 13- Love, friendship and what is in between (2)

Dear August,

As I rest for a few days at my parent’s home, between boredom, pleasure to see my family and high temperatures, I reflect on my recent experiences and try to make some sense. Alexandre, my 3 year and a half old godson, is a great source of inspiration.

Alexander met his recent love at the beach. It was a love at first sight and they became close in an instant. Despite his friend’s efforts to drown him and sand thrown in his eyes, nothing altered his feelings.

How long is this love going to last? Until he goes back home from holidays?

Do we fall in love that easily as we grow up? And when we do, when we keep this instinctive reaction can we trust our heart?

I have recently met a man with whom I have become great friends. Almost as easily as Alexandre did. It was during his holidays, and now he is back home. We talked for hours and hours. Is this a summer love, a friendship or something more?

The feeling of “meeting” someone, is so great! We find out that we share a common interest, something of value to both. If I love ice cream, and this person is an ice-cream flavor creator, it follows that I feel delighted to get to know him.Then we see that communication is easy.

If the meeting is brief, we don’t have the time to bother about our differences. When Alexander’s friend did something he didn’t like much, he decided to respond in the same way, but this was part of the game, and didn’t change at all his feelings. What do we do as grown ups regarding our differences?

Do we manage to create relationships after the first enthusiasm? Can feelings of love and friendship outlast our holidays?

August 2nd- finding love at the beach

Dear August,

I spoke to my godson Alexandre today, who is on holidays with his parents, at a little village of the South of France. Not far from the place where the artistic event took place. I am sorry to have missed them! Alexandre is three and a half and he has already found a girlfriend at the beach. Apparently she has thrown sand into his eyes and according to his mother has tried to drown him, but that doesn’t seem to have affected his feelings.

Is that what love is all about? His mother worries a little bit he will be overwhelmed by bossy women… until he said he would try to drown her tomorrow.

Is this what love is all about? And then why Alexandre doesn’t choose a kinder playmate? Is it less exciting? Do we need a feeling of danger to make things interesting?

I wouldn’t know what to say. I used to like men who seemed to be a little bit apart: artists, with a dark and sophisticated mood. Now I am more into people who are affectionate and sunny. Oh, and who cook or appreciate the quality of their food. Who can share and be playmates too.

Alexander has chosen excitement. Maybe it is an important component also. In order to keep passionate and interested.

Is he giving me an example or should I become one for him?

Probably both 🙂

http://www.crosslogicproductions.com/picsqjre/beach-sand-background

 

June 3 : personal growth and parenting

Dear June,

you have been of an unstable mood and this is kind of irresponsible; sorry to take it on you, but we have been waiting to wear summer clothes, hats, sun glasses, and instead we are taking out our umbrellas, on a daily basis. Well, I am sorry to be moody, but I have cought a slight cold.

And so has Alexandre my little god-son, in my hometown, as his mother informed me on the phone.

Or, Spiderman, because his Spider-mania continues.

Fortunately, I have a personal relationship with Spiderman, and I gave him an acount on his latest adventures.

Alexandre’s parents on their side, are facing the challenge of raising two babies and working full time.

How is it possible to continue doing things they need/and like? How not to feel that they sacrifice themselves? Is the smile of a child enough to compensate for not having time to go out, exerce, exist as a couple?

And then come other cases, of friends with broken couples. B, my favorite guy who tries to balance between his son and his job. S, father of a two year-old girl whose mother has a completely different idea than him on her upbringing. Or my friend E, mother of a little girl who cares a lot for her child and the father not at all.

How is it possible for the one who invests more time and effort to rebuilt a love-life with a new partner?

Actually, the only think I can tell my friends, because I am not having any experience on these questions, is the advice we are given in the airplanes in case there is a lack of oxygen. That parents need to wear their oxygen mask first, and then put it on their children. If they pass out, their children are also in danger. In that sense, taking care of oneself, could be a way to take care of the people we care for.

http://www.desk7.net/wallpapers.aspx?typeid=8243

April 30- last day

Dear April,

this is our last day: of the month for you, of my stay in my hometown for me.

I decided it was the moment to call the publishing houses I had submitted my novel to. The first two answered they were not interested in my way of writing. Since this was not very encouraging, I went to the old town to swallow it. I looked at the view of the city and the river, to get some inspiration.

Just behind me, two friends in their early twenties, were discussing relationships. Interactions, feelings, priorities, values… The girl wanted respect and a space for her to grow as a person. I was amazed how mature they were, I still had things to learn from them. If my 20-year-old self were there, he wouldn’t be able to follow.

At this point, Alexandre and his mother, my friend A, showed up out of the blue. This meeting contributed to chase away my blues. We all took a photo to commemorate our new haircuts, Alexandre’s and mine. Yes, I had a haircut in my hometown first thing this morning, don’t let Parisians know I prefered a hometown stylist, please!

After that, I decided to call up the other two publishing houses and ask if they had any news for me. They told me my novel is still in the evaluation process, I should get back to them in July. That was more hopeful.

There was a family dinner at my place, and then we watched an old black and white film. The main character, a 17-year-old girl, in love with a slightly older college professor, managed to get him interested in her. She knew what she wanted, and was acting in this direction. The film, produced in the early 1960’s showed a girl who also wanted to study. The professor was going to help her get accepted in the University.

My friend A also got the man she wanted. They might fight as the parents of two babies, but still, they are very close and complementary.

Each one has a quality, highly valued by the other.

 

 

 

 

April 27- rainy Sunday

Hi  April,

Spiderman came indeed in Alexandre’s sleep. He told me himself on the phone. His mother described him wearing on his head his underwear for a mask, and his socks as gloves, chasing around Marius, who copied him.

He wanted to speak with his godmother, who understands the Spider-mania.

And other “manias” of course.

His call found me at the local restaurant where I was having lunch with family and friends.

Outside, it was raining heavily.

Just after, I found a quiet spot and started taking notes for my next book.

That was good. I felt advancing.

 

April 25- the return of Spiderman

Dear April,

I realize that you are leaving us soon, and I also decided to leave my hometown on the same day.

Since I had been seriously working and stressing the day before, I decided to take it easy on this Friday. I woke up late, spent too much time showering, fixing my hair, doing my exercise routine.

It was almost the afternoon, when my good friend and mother of my godson, Alexandre, rung me up to see if I could meet with them: Alexandre, Marius, and the happy parents could come nearby. It sounded like a great idea, and before I knew it, they arrived.

Alexandre was very excited to be outdoors -he is ready to follow any stranger if he is heading to the front door of their apartment-.

As a serious and conscientious godmother I took him to some toys, in the form of an air-balloon and a taxi, that become agitated as soon as you put some coins in the right place. But as soon as he perceived some balls with the form of Spiderman on the surface, he managed to get his hands on one of them.

He was so excited, impossible not to buy it! With this acquisition we all went to the café near a place where he could play. Alexandre was in ecstasy: he threw the ball on some of the tables where innocent bystanders were having a drink or coffee. Three adolescents were frightened when the ball almost landed on their head.

Come play with me! Alexandre demanded.

And there I was running up and down, trying to avoid proximity with café clients. It was fun. Spiderman was at his best: he was going up, down, changed hands, feet.

I had a chance to talk to my friend A when P, Alexandre’s father was in charge of the Spiderman ball and the two kids.

We talked about life, friendship, ex-boyfriends, choices, what I look for in a man, growing up, having a purpose.

It was 23.00 when they decided it was time to go. Marius, already asleep didn’t have an objection, but Alexandre was not ready to go home.

Spiderman will come and pay us a visit this evening, I told him. But we need to have our eyes closed, if we want him to really manifest. I was hoping that if he closed his eyes, he would go to sleep.

I am not sure I have given him the right advice.

I’d better keep my eyes open when Spiderman drops by for a visit.

 

April 15- first day in my home town: the spiderman syndrome

April, hello

First day in my hometown. Do you want to know how my transformation advances?

Spiderman could be a useful metaphor for this:

I am godmother to one of my dearest friend’s sons: Alexandre is 3 years and a half and a big fun of Spiderman. His parents disapprove of this interest but the grandparents let him watch a film with the superhero. And he was “bitten” by spider-mania.

So I had no choice than to buy for him a spider-present. I also told him my version of the spider-hero, whom I know in person. The part that caught his attention was the transformation. Future Spiderman started as an average boy; at least, that is what he felt about himself. This is also what the others perceived him to be.

But, the fact that a spider bites him, radio-active or not- is the first step of his transformation to a super hero. Was it a form of destiny? Could he have “chosen” not to transform?

It seems that getting his super powers is irreversible. The choice is what he decides to do with them. He could have ignored them and hidden them even from himself. He could have turned bad and tried to dominate all those he could.

So the question for me is: I have powers and talents.

Am I conscious of that?

And

What do I do with them?