February 24, 2021-Cognitive Flexibility to find new balance

Hello February,

when something takes us out of balance, literally or metaphorically, how do we establish a new balance? Has it ever happened to you, when one year you have 28 days and another 29?

Cognitive flexibility is something I read about, and it seems very appropriate to develop a new sense of balance and resilience.

After having some vertigo, I was told it is important to walk out and to use my brain to a new sense of balance. It’s probably the same when something is disturbing our mental or emotional balance.

A new one needs to be established and a flexibility in the way we see things is important.

I was talking to a friend who is looking for the love of her life during the pandemic. She mentions that she is decided to meet someone, but she excludes any form of online communication. In my eyes, this is a bit restrictive.

But I realise, that I am equally set in my ways, when someone else points out a way of action I don’t approve.

I might be more open in one respect, and closed and fixed in another.

But if we change everything, will we have principles after all? A strong sense of self?

Probably if we dissociate strong from fixed.

Strong is flexible. Strong is not afraid to mutate and to change.

I seem to believe that not many people will understand me and accept my lifestyle and goals.

Is this actually true?

Have I formulated and communicated what I want and believe to other people or spent more time hiding it to fit in?

That is something to consider ๐Ÿ™‚

February 11, 2021: Post-a-day and Self-praise protection before and after receiving nasty criticism- we need both

Hello February,

yes, it is a beautiful winter day today; I am feeling better after vertigo, thank you for asking. Indeed, this is why you haven’t seen me more. But it was probably necessary to slow down a bit.

It felt as if I pushed myself too hard with resolutions and to do lists, and I forgot that the most important thing is to enjoy the moment and feel grateful for the air we breathe…

I also admit that I was sad with some criticism I found harsh, and it brought back fears and insecurities.

Taking criticism personally, or being afraid that whatever it is about will be difficult to deal with, this is what made me feel bad.

I realise, that if we believe in our self-worth, criticism can be faced constructively. It is like, “of course, I can learn how to do this better”, or to go towards something I enjoy more.

On the other hand, even when you try your best, someone might not be happy. It is important to put some boundaries to malevolent criticism. Like, thank you, but no, thank you.

Like: “I am sorry you don’t feel well about yourselves, critical guys, and you need to throw all this in my front door. This belongs to you, not to me”.

I sympathise, but I need to go though a ceremony of self-Praise before I deal with that.

Let me make it more concrete.

Let’s say, I am a student, and I have failed, or had bad marks in my assignments. I receive a particularly nasty comment from my professor with personal comments on laziness, not getting the point, making me feel stupid, lazy, not delivering anything worth while. There are also points about not getting my degree.

On my side, I think this is what I love. I felt that I have tried a lot, despite difficult circumstances. What do I do?

Finding at least five reasons I am great for each negative comment. Then, looking at this negative critique and trying to see if there is any concrete, any actionable material.

If there is, then I take note.

Then, I wear my best, and praise myself in front of the mirror. Isn’t it great, to be able to deliver an assignment which almost passed, despite working part time, having to help my family and to face some blues? I am an awesome person. Then, have some coffee and a piece of chocolate.

Now, let’s see if I can get some constructive feedback from someone who is positive, and then try to see how to address the couple of useful points made. And forget about the third one, it was just the bad mood of this critique.

Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

https://www.inc.com/scott-mautz/doing-this-1-simple-thing-in-face-of-criticism-gives-your-self-confidence-a-tremendous-boost.html

Self love lettering with flowers Free Vector

January 31st, 2021- Monthly update and post-a-day

Hello January,

how has it been this month? Well I ended up with some vertigo, possibly because I felt having too many things on my plate, and too many screen hours working from home.

Yes, that’s why I wasn’t on a post-a-day basis the last week. But I have been journaling a phrase or two on my paper journal.

I wanted to eat less sugar: this is accomplished, although I still have some chocolates and mini cup-cates.

Rest and Sleep? Kind of ok, although rest is also not having my eyes fixated on the computer screen 14 hours a day. More progress is possible.

Exercise? I have done some, but need to go more outdoors (related to less screen time)

Learning? Yes, new things but I need to learn how to be confident during the learning process.

Journaling every day? Yes, even though not always blogging.

Any difficulties?

I felt overwhelmed when I received some negative critique, and forgot the positive one. Apparently we need 5 times more positive feedback to forget a negative one.

And, not confident during learning process, that’s how I panicked.

So, now what?

February, goal no 1:

  1. Boost Self-Confidence
  2. Reduce screen time, meaning not watching series and films and try audio-books and outdoors activities, such as… walking!
10 Things You Can Do to Boost Self-Confidence

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/281874

January 24, 2021- Post-a-day- Day 15 out of 71- Every day, give yourself a present!

Hello January,

The week-end is a nice time to update progress. So, how is it going?

I read “the Book of Joy” and revisited the “Bullet Journal Method”, to better organise myself.

Ever since I know me, I had two challenges: balancing overwhelming emotions, and respecting time constraints.

Let’s face it: for me, being an artist is letting our imagination run wild, live in the present, follow our heart.

On the other side, real life is work, school and an infinity of time specific constraints. When I loose the notion of time, reading a good book or writing, I might wake up late for a meeting, or finding out that I have burnt my lunch.

How do I balance my wild imagination and the need for freedom, with the necessity of living in a specific time and place with certain constraints?

I went for help to the Bullet Journal, and now I try to implement what it says.

Reading the chapter on Gratitude, I also took note of a very beautiful thought attributed to Agent Cooper, a character in David Lynch’s film: Twin Peaks:

“Every day, once a day, give yourself a present”!

January 22, 2021-Post-a-day, day 14 out of 70- conquering bureaucracy

Hello January,

do you also have any type of bureaucracy or administration where you live? Because be it France, UK or elsewhere, I find myself obliged to gather documents and create files so that I can prove my case: it could be to ask for a fellowship, or to apply for a job, or … and this, I have to admit is something I don’t like.

Time consuming, making you go backwards and forwards for a tiny little thing you forgot; in any case, I have tried all the possible moods: anger, exasperation, disappointment, despair, etc. Then, a form of learned helplessness.

To finish with a kind of detached mood I have adopted: I’ll do something every Thursday, for example, for an hour and that will be it. Independently of how long this will take.

What if you are in a rush? If it is urgent? Somehow, bureaucracy doesn’t care about it. So, trying to speak the same language and be less emotional involved, independently of the high stakes, is the only solution.

And somehow, step by step, even a bureaucratic mountain can be conquered!

Yes we can!!!

Pile of paper, busy businessman with stack of documents in carton, cardboard box. Paperwork. Bureaucracy concept. Stressed. Employee. Vector cartoon design vector illustration

January 20, 2021-Post-a-day, day 13 out of 69 – constant effort and detachment

Hello January,

I was going to sleep when I noticed I haven’t written today- it has been a virtually fast day from home, working online.

I was worrying about my online presentation, but it finally went well: I am really happy for this.

Then, there is another matter, the kind I have been following for about a year, and it looks like a major book project; the moment I think it finishes, and I will finally feel rewarded for all the time and effort, something new comes up.

Instead of despairing, I decided to try another approach: detachment.

So, I will try, no matter what. Not blindly, but in a serious and dedicated way.

The way the sea is coming again and again against a Rock.

January 19, 2021- Post-a-day, day 12 out of 69-

Dear January,

yes, it is a sunny cold day today, and I have had two morning coffees, continuing with tea. Reading about world challenges in the morning or just enjoying our lockdown thinking that hiding under the bedclothes we can emerge when challenges are over?

So, how do I feel energised and ready to learn statistics? By loving statistics, and seeing them as a game. How about dream time? Well, visiting the blog of my friend Brian: https://equinoxio21.wordpress.com is offering scope for imagination, even more than any series could do! Enjoy!

Full of magic and views of everyday World Art. It always makes me feel like travelling!!!

Back to Statistics now ๐Ÿ™‚

Mathematics and Poetry: Some Impressions | The Daily Star

https://www.thedailystar.net/literature/news/mathematics-and-poetry-some-impressions-1963677

January 18, 2021- Post-a-day day 11 out of 69

Hello January,

it was snowing this morning, and with the lockdown there is a feeling of being enveloped in a mystic cocoon, kind of hibernating.

On the other hand, I am to start a new assignment on Wednesday, and all I intended to do this weekend was not completed. On the positive side, I did finish marking on time, which is great.

So I have been efficient, but sometimes there is a difficulty to concentrate and to be productive. Let’s respect that, by trying at the same time to reduce sugar and eat more fruit and vegetables.

How do we feel energised and focused?

Starting with berries and orange juice, and I should get hold of some quinoa and protein?

Also taking into account there are moments we work better and moments we need to recover or go slowly. Distinguishing between them could be the most important instead of pushing ourselves.

boost energy naturally

https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/4-ways-to-boost-your-energy-naturally-with-breakfast

January 16, 2021-post-a-day, day 11 out of 67-Saturday jazz coffee and Arsene Lupin books

Hello January,

yes, it is cold outside, and I already fed the garden cat; also had a cup of coffee and now I switch to tea before starting to work.

Oh, and I got up at 7.33, by the way.

On a Saturday? Well, yes. If you need time to Dream and Do.

Yesterday’s plan didn’t go as expected.

I did less and it took me more time than what I hoped for.

So? I will reschedule.

How about fun time?

Meeting up with friends?

Today we are cooking “coq au vin” or chicken with wine, a French recipe very fit for cold weather.

I will also order some other classics, and Arsรจne Lupin could be something to revisit

Amazon.fr - The Extraordinary Adventures of Arsene Lupin: Gentleman-Burglar  - LeBlanc, Maurice - Livres

January 15, 2021-Post-a-day, day 10 out of 66- what happens when you skip a day?

Hello January,

what happens when you skip a day when you want to install a new habit? self-flagellation like in the Medieval times? When people were walking and hitting themselves for their wrongs and sins?

Well, maybe there are other new versions of that.

Instead, it could be, yes, I did, but I also had a very productive day. Should I start over? Maybe I should, actually. So, I had a reason.

Now what practically?

I suggest that I continue and I add the number of days I missed, so, instead of 66, 67 days

What else? Something fulfilling to relax instead of watching a series.

What could that be?

I was drawing a few years back, I could do it again,

Sending my poems to this interesting poet I met last year in London

Developing my. blog and creating ebooks,

That is something I can do, actually ๐Ÿ™‚

https://www.thecuriouslycreative.com/list-of-creative-hobbies/