July 4, 2020-Inspiration from Hamilton musical

Hello July,

Freedom is so important, to be, to feel, to write, to breath, to become!

A tribute to Independence Day, and to Independence from anything that holds us back, to become our fully developed selves, in respect for others who also are in their development path.

After slowing down for the second part of June, I realise it is important to be and feel authentic, going in the direction that inspires us and respecting who we are.

What kind of new habit to start in July?

Journaling everyday, and going back to fiction writing.

Reading literature,

Writing Poetry

Finding time and making space to be, feel and look our best!

Smiling to ourselves in the mirror every day,

We did it!

Some inspiration from the musical “Hamilton” : Hamilton-poster.jpg

https://theconversation.com/hamilton-the-diverse-musical-with-representation-problems-141473

May 7 and 8, 2020- Day 4 and 5- Great instead of High Expectations

May hello,

two very busy days and my hopes got up a little bit with a possibility for a collaboration. There is an artist I met last year and she invited me to participate to a collective project. It seems good and this person is trustworthy, I think.

So, I put myself to work for it.

Let’s see how it goes.

I was so excited to work on something creative and inspiring again!

Almost afraid to raise my expectations for fear of disappointment (what I learn in CBT).

Barnes And Noble Flexibound Classics: Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

May 3, 2020- How to change disappointment into motivation and action

Hello May,

I woke up with the best intentions, walked by myself, had coffee, and then it hit me: a negative answer from a publisher on a piece of work. A piece I have worked and worked over for several years.

Not to mention, it has been rejected a few times.

I can’t describe my feelings. Anger, he doesn’t understand, feeling miserable for myself, here is where I ended with all these rejections… more general statements about my life etc.

Then, I thought: let’s change that.

Indeed, I need to do something differently.

To begin with, to tell myself: I DESERVE THE BEST IN LIFE, as everybody else.

Why?

Try, why not?

Planet Earth is bountiful.

So, second step: I need help. Let’s go around and ask for some.

Let’s identify people who could help me.

Then, get some chocolate.

And also, think whether there is a better strategy.

There is something simple which could be done in a different way.

Something which is related to the packaging.

And let’s dance a bit!

And let’s also do something I like a lot, like, write a new poem

Check on Art:

https://archive.org/details/meisterw00kren/page/42/mode/2up

 

April 13, 2020- Old wounds masked as today’s lack of confidence

Hello April,

why haven’t I finished my work? Why didn’t I submit it after all the work I have put on it? Why have I left my stuff in Paris abandoned?

Because I thought I couldn’t face all these challenges and then I felt that the sky was falling on my head as Astrerix and Obelix in the famous cartoon would say.

But after all, all wounds are there and they stir up the sauce even if I pretend to ignore them.

Can I do something?

Let’s finish my work, to begin with.

As if it were somebody else’s.

Let’s act.

Let’s accept those hurt feelings and honour this girl who went through all these.

My past self.

Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 14

https://www.wikihow.com/Heal-Old-Wounds

April 1st, 2020- 6 Year Blog-Anniversary! Happy Birthday April4June6!

Welcome April,

again, in this strange period where we humans realise how much we have in common and how vulnerable we are without cooperation!

Six years after I started blogging, at the beginning only for three months: April to June, with the promise to write every day. And I did!

I was facing a wannabe boss who fired me in Paris, France, heartbreak, financial instability, health issues of members of my family and some passing issues with me, eh… kind a few actually!

In the meanwhile I changed country and language, went to London, changed again, went through precarious jobs and relationships, … published a book, got a new job, published some poetry…

And here I am in my starting point, at my parents’ home waiting for the virus storm to pass, hoping and praying it will get better for all of us…

And thinking of ways to act responsibly in the world emerging…

Still, a lot of reasons to celebrate, and most of all, celebrate the trajectory, wins and losses, getting back up and continuing…

And THANKING friends, people who have stood by, blogfriends, everyday life friends, unknown kind passers by who smiled, flowers, animals, kids, the wind in my cheek…

HappY BirthdaY April4June6 WordPress blog, it’s time we expand… I will tell you how 🙂

February 7, 2020- How to feel when encountering a roadblock

Hello February,

I just felt down because I have almost encountered a roadblock. I was late to submit a funding application for a project and I might not afford to go there by myself.

On the one hand, I feel guilty for not having prevented it, on the other side there is a feeling of overwhelm with all the dates, and other things happening into my life.

How to be on top of that without constantly following a crazy and meaningless program?

Well, I will try use Siri in my iPhone more. When I see a deadline I should right away make a note on my calendar instead of thinking about it.

Hmm

And change my mood. Feeling bad about myself is not the way.

Yes, I self-sabotaged because I was waiting for someone else to say I could do it.

Or the perfect occasion.

Or, to ask people to stretch for me and get a feeling they care.

Or, all of it together.

Now, let’s assume that and continue.

I will definitely read again David Allen’s book which I put aside.

And change my mood.

Give a big hug to myself for doing so well.

Yes, I deserve this!

And YES I CAN!!!

Image titled Be in Your Happy Place Step 9

January 1st, 2020- New Year, NEW ME

Welcome 2020,

Welcome my dear New Year! Here I am, having a glass of wine and feeling extremely hopeful and in a good mood. There is no particular reason for this. I am having a party by myself, after my parents got to sleep in my small French village, and I am listening to some music.

I spent much time being afraid in 2019, but despite everything, I am proud to have pulled it through in a decent way and to have reached a milestone compared to my previous life.

There is something that is appearing as a possibility to live from my whatever activity.

And also, I want to choose my friends as to real friends, because I don’t need “figurines” or replacements because I can stand by myself. Anyone who wants to stand by me could be because we are enjoying it and not because we are afraid.

Happy 2020,

Prosperous 2020

Beautiful 2020,

Happy New Year 2020 Wishes

November 13, 2019- Watching “Hamilton”, in London and rediscovering passion

Hello November,

and welcome back to passion! I just watched “Hamilton”, the musical, from the front row, and I was impressed with these characters’ passion, and the actors’ game.

These people were living and dying with purpose, which is something I need in my everyday life, or I need to rediscover. There are many great purposes out there, and purposes I believe in, so it’s time to say something.

All the rest, is for people who are not lovers.

In the first sense of the word.

I also found myself in a strange place.

Being invited by someone who didn’t know what exactly he wanted.

I know what I want.

And that, is a man with passion and conviction

A way to fall in love

November 13, 2019- Knowing how not to get affected by childhood dynamics

Hello November,

how is it that our parents have a way to get into us that other people don’t? Somehow, feelings become magnified when something is related to them. All the childhood memories, wounds, happy moments become activated.

When it’s good, it’s great.

I mean, not everyone has a chance to grow up with parents who take care of them as kids, so, having experienced that is a blessing in itself.

Still, we are all human beings and parents are also human. The best of them can also instil feelings of guilt on something, or not being good enough or worthy of X, Y and Z.

And then we might find partners or other people who reinforce this dynamic as we grow.

So what to do when we catch ourselves there?

It’s important to say: STOP and rewind.

Is this playing the same old film?

What if I step out and refuse to be part of it?

That’s what I do.

I step out for coffee.

I write in my blog.

I am not responsible for my parents’ happiness or unhappiness.

I may contribute, but it’s their life also.

And I can’t take the blame for anything that seems not to work.

Or for anything that does.

Let’s do the best I can.

And forgive them, and forgive myself for not being perfect.

And thank them, and thank me for who we are.

I likes this one :

When You’re Hard on Yourself: Replace Guilt with Self-Compassion

November 11, 2019- Happy and Creative Birthday with a Good Feeling Spa

Hello November,

hello my birthday month, I am grateful for being here, on this planet, in London, this century, in a hair salon right now!

It was about time apparently, according to a prep friend who commented that I start looking like a hippie, with two months dark racine coming out of my otherwise ginger hair.

Despite anything, it is so great to be around, and I want to make plans again, to have objectives and to go for them!

Writing a play is on the top of the list, releasing feelings that have been bottled up.

Making beautiful fireworks!

And the everyday commitments?

There is time for them also.

The most important thing is to say, hello Beautiful, maybe you made mistakes, or you run into roadblocks, you shed tears, but you also succeeded, loved, been loved, and all this adventure has been quiet inspiring!

What would I want for the next step?

A Spa of feelings, where you are receiving extra treatment for feelings, enveloped in a warm, and light, and pampering glow of LOVE!

LOVE is the best feeling SPA, and it’s like money and energy, it needs to circulate.

So, for the next step, a Good Feeling Spa, for me and all the real and virtual friends!

Brands should be smarter about "Happy Birthday" promotions.