after working late at night, I also woke up late, at 8.30, and the weather from my window was cloudy; at least I dreamt waking up on a sandy beautiful beach; the post-holiday, post-big cake blues are here, and having to concentrate and focus on work is not easy.
Neither listening to a podcast about reasons why relationships don’t stick.
In reality, I have a theory: the need to focus on my mission in life: my work. That and having been an international nomad doesn’t always fit with sedentary people.
I applied for one or two positions, decided to camp at a café and write, but the blues were here to haunt me.
All these things, people who don’t like my behaviour, insecurity, instability and insanity: how to find some space away from it and have some fun?
Because if we don’t have fun, what on earth are we doing here?
The birds sing, the bees whatever, the … I need to find the song that explains it all very well.
In other words, first we need some fun and then, we can be responsible.
Or maybe I say so because I don’t have children to take to school and who would suffer malnutrition if I forget about feeding them.
A friend of mine told me today that those who can forget practicalities are the children. Anybody else, even the richest on this planet have to deal with them. So, if you grow up you get attacked by the practical side of life.
here I am, responsible of a small artistic project in Istanbul, whereas at the same time I am looking for funding and a job. Oh, and not to forget, today is the “fête de la musique” in Paris. How do I put myself together?
Yesterday I had a meeting with an agent from the States, who had risen my hopes. He was interested in my project but could only suggest sources of funding to contact. Ok, this is already something.
And I haven’t finished preparation for the artistic event I organize in Istanbul. But have made progress in the right direction.
How about taking a break and “lose myself to dance”?
I was to have a meeting with the big boss this morning, but something came up and he postponed it to tomorrow morning.
This is ok, but he also added I need to discuss the details of my project with the wannabe boss, the no 2, and this is what I have been trying to avoid. The wannabe boss has been very hard on me last year, and I want to go around him, let him be in a parallel universe to mine. Like two planets with a different orbit…
At the same time, there is the funding proposal for the end of the week. The deadline could be useful to concentrate and come up with something clear that can be communicated to other people…
I have advanced with that last night, however, there is more 🙂
After some moments of self-doubt and questioning, I went to the nearest park and watched the trees, the grass and birds. It was an inspiring moment. If I am going to convince anyone, I have first to be convinced of my ideas. And enthusiastic about them! Isn’t it great!
The most important thing is to have fun with the whole process 🙂