February 7, 2020- How to feel when encountering a roadblock

Hello February,

I just felt down because I have almost encountered a roadblock. I was late to submit a funding application for a project and I might not afford to go there by myself.

On the one hand, I feel guilty for not having prevented it, on the other side there is a feeling of overwhelm with all the dates, and other things happening into my life.

How to be on top of that without constantly following a crazy and meaningless program?

Well, I will try use Siri in my iPhone more. When I see a deadline I should right away make a note on my calendar instead of thinking about it.

Hmm

And change my mood. Feeling bad about myself is not the way.

Yes, I self-sabotaged because I was waiting for someone else to say I could do it.

Or the perfect occasion.

Or, to ask people to stretch for me and get a feeling they care.

Or, all of it together.

Now, let’s assume that and continue.

I will definitely read again David Allen’s book which I put aside.

And change my mood.

Give a big hug to myself for doing so well.

Yes, I deserve this!

And YES I CAN!!!

Image titled Be in Your Happy Place Step 9

February 2, 2020- Let’s get lucky this month and “get things done”!

Wellcome February,

2nd day of the 2nd month of 2020, and all those 2s make me want to accelerate and get lucky!

I had coffee, I crossed paths with a charming neighbour and I worked seriously and unproductively during the day. Then, I bought “getting things done”, by David Allen, and decided to try his suggestions on productivity.

When my reals self wants to run wild in the woods, revolt against any type of obligation and challenge anyone who might try to oppress my creative energies.

Hmm, all that when I need to re-do some of the work I did last month because I didn’t exactly follow the criteria.

Well, I am reading it, so that I get things done and most of all I get dreams into reality

January 9, 2020: Back to London!

Hello January,

I am full of resolutions and I got up early today, decided to be my best self possible;

By midday, I have advanced at the things I was to finish during holidays, but I feel a bit stressed up with practical issues I have started but didn’t finish due to all this cake.

How will I chase away any fog and feel and act with confidence?

Well, I decided to eat better to begin with. Try and see if super greens are as super as they are reputed for.

Now, when it comes to people harassing us for former mistakes or failing to live up to their expectations what to do?

Just do something and see if it works.

One step a day.

Baby steps

baby steps 1

Baby steps for future millionaires (part 1)

January 7, 2020- Getting a promotion in 2020

Hello January,

have you ever felt like you were getting a promotion? I don’t know if you can be more than the first month of the year, but imagine you could. What would it be like?

Well, in my case, after realising how expensive is a latte in Notting Hill, I decided it is about time to get a promotion. After all, I have been working already for three months.

Am I already mastering my new job? Not exactly, but I am working on it. What is more, I feel I have a lot more to give.

So, after having indulged myself in huge quantities of chocolate and pastries, and been lazy and sick with a flue, I made up my mind: 2020 is going to be a Promotion Year.

Let’s see: I am learning what I need to learn to get to the next level.

Is this credible? Or incredible?

Both, and of course I see myself there already.

For the time being, I prepare my suitcase.

I am coming back to London!

promotion%20clipart

December 27, 2019- Wrapping up certain things before the year comes to en end?

Hello December,

I have added a question mark because I don’t want to put pressure on my flu-suffering head. Yes, there are things to do. The kind of things I don’t like to face. The practical ones. The ones that if you don’t do you are not an adult and eventually, everyone will notice.

On the other hand, we do I avoid to look into the abysse? Because I am afraid I will not know what to do. And I will just stress.

I might feel bad about myself, not successful enough, not beautiful enough, not enough of something.

How about asking for help?

This is probably the best one. I need to ask for help and advice instead of pretending they don’t exist.

How about seeing myself as all there is to it?

There must be some technique to say, wait a minute, I am good and gorgeous enough, I am Worthy and my hair is just awesome today. It can be nice tomorrow also, but that doesn’t take away anything from their awesomeness today.

And I don’t need to post a picture to prove it.

Doing something special.

Giving oneself a medal?

What if some people disagree with this?

Let’s not ask them!

https://www.printavo.com/blog/year-end-checklist-10-things-you-must-do-before-wrapping-up-the-year

November 13, 2019- Watching “Hamilton”, in London and rediscovering passion

Hello November,

and welcome back to passion! I just watched “Hamilton”, the musical, from the front row, and I was impressed with these characters’ passion, and the actors’ game.

These people were living and dying with purpose, which is something I need in my everyday life, or I need to rediscover. There are many great purposes out there, and purposes I believe in, so it’s time to say something.

All the rest, is for people who are not lovers.

In the first sense of the word.

I also found myself in a strange place.

Being invited by someone who didn’t know what exactly he wanted.

I know what I want.

And that, is a man with passion and conviction

A way to fall in love

November 12, 2019- Growing up through pain and delight

Hello November,

I had a beautiful birthday with cake, candles and friends. At the same time I felt that loving ones are not with me, because it is not possible, and I felt between guilt and sorrow.

At the same time, I realise that mourning a part of our previous life is normal, it is growing up. Something needs to go away in order to free space for the new.

I can’t be an adult and have profound relationships if my only point of reference is my parents. This is not good in someone 20s, even. So much more when you are more of a grown up.

Not having yet a family unit of my own, makes me more attached to my original family. But this is an illusion.

There was never a paradise in any age, and our relationships need balance between giving and receiving.

Do I allow people to come near me in order to create adult relationships?

And when I think about adult, I mean anything from friendships, professional, love and romance, even animals.

It would be great to adopt an animal.

Or a human being.

In any case, start to become an adult;

At least in some aspects of my existence.

I am afraid there are still a few clothes on the chair and floor 🙂

November 7, 2019- Challenges and how to raise up to meet them: NaNoWriMo

Hello November,

I have arrived tired, and I feel that small or bigger things happening are pushing me around. I don’t come up as confident in the new job, and I lose my calm.

Add to that the seasonal flu, and you get the picture.

So, how do I face this? I try for something, it looks overambitious and misses the point.

Who should I talk to?

To begin with, I need my energy, or my Chi to get circulating again.

How about breathing?

Breath in and breath out.

How am I going to give myself a break?

The thing is, when we need one, we usually don’t have it.

Then, how do we create the right space?

By creative writing of course.

NaNoWriMo, this is the writing month after all.

But I want to write a play instead of a novel.

Let’s see how it goes.

I have the idea already.

And the characters.

Maybe in between, I can go back to my question.

How about doing something right now?

November 6, 2019- Unbottled feelings

Dear November,

my feelings range from excited, to fear, to angry, to sad, to happy. I am trying to decide if I should move closer to my new job. If I should stay in my new job. If they appreciate me in my new job.

Is there a moment to doubt? Ok let’s be honest with myself. I worked for about a year in this direction. Why do I start doubting?

Because I have a fear of commitment.

What if I feel alienated?

If they don’t understand, etc, me?

If I find it too difficult?

Maybe I am not good enough.

Or too different.

Something.

The funny thing with fears, when you stop to talk to them, is that they come from different directions.

How can it be both too difficult and I too good for it? Or not challenged enough?

It’s like dating someone we don’t feel attracted to, and then feel offended if this person wants to break up.

How dare you?

I was too good for you, to begin with.

So?

So, now I am here, where I am.

I think that I can look at this present, and love it for what it is.

Not what it should be.

Not what it will be.

How will I give it a serious chance to succeed?

Is moving out of London too destabilising for now?

I feel secure to be close to my old neighbourhood.

To keep something constant in the name of change.

A Modern Dilemma

https://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/lifematters/features/modern-dilemmas/

November 1st, 2019- Beginning new adventures

Welcome November!

I went out for a walk this morning, thinking that letting go of some things makes space for new ones to come. Yes, some old and comfortable clothes with memories feel so difficult to part with, but it’s also possible to accept that we can be equally or more happy with new ones arriving.

And these new clothes might bring new aspects of ourselves, ready to express themselves out there!

I love this automne colours and the mysterious winter somewhere in the distance.

So, I am ready for new adventures, and I want to fill in my imaginary and real journal with rich experiences, love and success in growing. With many different ways to enjoy every minute.

And by thinking of long term goals and not just of day to day things to accomplish.

And art is a way of living after all, let’s put that to practice!

Orange leaves on trees in Richmond Park, London, in autumn

https://londonist.com/london/great-outdoors/autumn-trees-red-orange-leaves-walks-london