January 9, 2020: Back to London!

Hello January,

I am full of resolutions and I got up early today, decided to be my best self possible;

By midday, I have advanced at the things I was to finish during holidays, but I feel a bit stressed up with practical issues I have started but didn’t finish due to all this cake.

How will I chase away any fog and feel and act with confidence?

Well, I decided to eat better to begin with. Try and see if super greens are as super as they are reputed for.

Now, when it comes to people harassing us for former mistakes or failing to live up to their expectations what to do?

Just do something and see if it works.

One step a day.

Baby steps

baby steps 1

Baby steps for future millionaires (part 1)

January 7, 2020- Getting a promotion in 2020

Hello January,

have you ever felt like you were getting a promotion? I don’t know if you can be more than the first month of the year, but imagine you could. What would it be like?

Well, in my case, after realising how expensive is a latte in Notting Hill, I decided it is about time to get a promotion. After all, I have been working already for three months.

Am I already mastering my new job? Not exactly, but I am working on it. What is more, I feel I have a lot more to give.

So, after having indulged myself in huge quantities of chocolate and pastries, and been lazy and sick with a flue, I made up my mind: 2020 is going to be a Promotion Year.

Let’s see: I am learning what I need to learn to get to the next level.

Is this credible? Or incredible?

Both, and of course I see myself there already.

For the time being, I prepare my suitcase.

I am coming back to London!

promotion%20clipart

December 27, 2019- Wrapping up certain things before the year comes to en end?

Hello December,

I have added a question mark because I don’t want to put pressure on my flu-suffering head. Yes, there are things to do. The kind of things I don’t like to face. The practical ones. The ones that if you don’t do you are not an adult and eventually, everyone will notice.

On the other hand, we do I avoid to look into the abysse? Because I am afraid I will not know what to do. And I will just stress.

I might feel bad about myself, not successful enough, not beautiful enough, not enough of something.

How about asking for help?

This is probably the best one. I need to ask for help and advice instead of pretending they don’t exist.

How about seeing myself as all there is to it?

There must be some technique to say, wait a minute, I am good and gorgeous enough, I am Worthy and my hair is just awesome today. It can be nice tomorrow also, but that doesn’t take away anything from their awesomeness today.

And I don’t need to post a picture to prove it.

Doing something special.

Giving oneself a medal?

What if some people disagree with this?

Let’s not ask them!

https://www.printavo.com/blog/year-end-checklist-10-things-you-must-do-before-wrapping-up-the-year

November 13, 2019- Watching “Hamilton”, in London and rediscovering passion

Hello November,

and welcome back to passion! I just watched “Hamilton”, the musical, from the front row, and I was impressed with these characters’ passion, and the actors’ game.

These people were living and dying with purpose, which is something I need in my everyday life, or I need to rediscover. There are many great purposes out there, and purposes I believe in, so it’s time to say something.

All the rest, is for people who are not lovers.

In the first sense of the word.

I also found myself in a strange place.

Being invited by someone who didn’t know what exactly he wanted.

I know what I want.

And that, is a man with passion and conviction

A way to fall in love

November 12, 2019- Growing up through pain and delight

Hello November,

I had a beautiful birthday with cake, candles and friends. At the same time I felt that loving ones are not with me, because it is not possible, and I felt between guilt and sorrow.

At the same time, I realise that mourning a part of our previous life is normal, it is growing up. Something needs to go away in order to free space for the new.

I can’t be an adult and have profound relationships if my only point of reference is my parents. This is not good in someone 20s, even. So much more when you are more of a grown up.

Not having yet a family unit of my own, makes me more attached to my original family. But this is an illusion.

There was never a paradise in any age, and our relationships need balance between giving and receiving.

Do I allow people to come near me in order to create adult relationships?

And when I think about adult, I mean anything from friendships, professional, love and romance, even animals.

It would be great to adopt an animal.

Or a human being.

In any case, start to become an adult;

At least in some aspects of my existence.

I am afraid there are still a few clothes on the chair and floor 🙂

November 7, 2019- Challenges and how to raise up to meet them: NaNoWriMo

Hello November,

I have arrived tired, and I feel that small or bigger things happening are pushing me around. I don’t come up as confident in the new job, and I lose my calm.

Add to that the seasonal flu, and you get the picture.

So, how do I face this? I try for something, it looks overambitious and misses the point.

Who should I talk to?

To begin with, I need my energy, or my Chi to get circulating again.

How about breathing?

Breath in and breath out.

How am I going to give myself a break?

The thing is, when we need one, we usually don’t have it.

Then, how do we create the right space?

By creative writing of course.

NaNoWriMo, this is the writing month after all.

But I want to write a play instead of a novel.

Let’s see how it goes.

I have the idea already.

And the characters.

Maybe in between, I can go back to my question.

How about doing something right now?

November 6, 2019- Unbottled feelings

Dear November,

my feelings range from excited, to fear, to angry, to sad, to happy. I am trying to decide if I should move closer to my new job. If I should stay in my new job. If they appreciate me in my new job.

Is there a moment to doubt? Ok let’s be honest with myself. I worked for about a year in this direction. Why do I start doubting?

Because I have a fear of commitment.

What if I feel alienated?

If they don’t understand, etc, me?

If I find it too difficult?

Maybe I am not good enough.

Or too different.

Something.

The funny thing with fears, when you stop to talk to them, is that they come from different directions.

How can it be both too difficult and I too good for it? Or not challenged enough?

It’s like dating someone we don’t feel attracted to, and then feel offended if this person wants to break up.

How dare you?

I was too good for you, to begin with.

So?

So, now I am here, where I am.

I think that I can look at this present, and love it for what it is.

Not what it should be.

Not what it will be.

How will I give it a serious chance to succeed?

Is moving out of London too destabilising for now?

I feel secure to be close to my old neighbourhood.

To keep something constant in the name of change.

A Modern Dilemma

https://www.abc.net.au/radionational/programs/lifematters/features/modern-dilemmas/

November 1st, 2019- Beginning new adventures

Welcome November!

I went out for a walk this morning, thinking that letting go of some things makes space for new ones to come. Yes, some old and comfortable clothes with memories feel so difficult to part with, but it’s also possible to accept that we can be equally or more happy with new ones arriving.

And these new clothes might bring new aspects of ourselves, ready to express themselves out there!

I love this automne colours and the mysterious winter somewhere in the distance.

So, I am ready for new adventures, and I want to fill in my imaginary and real journal with rich experiences, love and success in growing. With many different ways to enjoy every minute.

And by thinking of long term goals and not just of day to day things to accomplish.

And art is a way of living after all, let’s put that to practice!

Orange leaves on trees in Richmond Park, London, in autumn

https://londonist.com/london/great-outdoors/autumn-trees-red-orange-leaves-walks-london

October 14, 2019- Monday Motivation in London

Hello October,

It’s Monday, it’s raining in London, and I feel I have been running behind goals, deadlines, etc. People expect things from me, I expect things from myself, and on top of that, I got to face a mini-virus.

Yes, starting something new is exciting, but it can also be stressful.

I am by my old gallery today, a powerful platform that gives me mixed feelings. I have had some hard times here and my self esteem has been tested.

But a platform also involves human beings that I like and appreciate. I have a small project with them.

Instead of thinking of whatever has been hurtful, let’s concentrate on what is inspiring right now.

Am I going to places for an external glow of power? This is meaningless, and it soon involves disappointments. On the other side, if it is to see it as a platform for meeting people and doing something together, then, it makes sense.

But it’s time I value myself more, my time, and the exposure to situations that are not bringing anything to my or anybody else’s growth.

So, farewell to anything that doesn’t serve this purpose!

And use difficult roads as fuel for our future growth!

 

How To Focus On Your Personal Growth

October 3, 2019- New job challenges in London

Dear October,

is it hard the first few days of your job? There seem to be so many things to absorb, and clients to keep satisfied, and on top of that a virus, yes, a virus!

So? What to do? I took two days off, working from home to pull myself together.

And of course, to write to my favourite journal.

Now, it seems that I don’t come out as competent and confident as a great artist and gorgeous woman that I am.

Well, maybe it helps that all my clothes for two seasons are in my suitcase, the one I brought with me to London 🙂

I decided to go through the internet for help, and start some morning affirmations.

How about reaching out to others also?

https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/7890-first-week-new-job.html