November 3 – A four-day challenge for me!

Hello November,

you came with a new challenge for me: I decided to submit a project for funding for November 7. When did I find out about the call? Three days ago, and I have a lot of material to propose, but I really need to put it well together in order to show what I’ve got 🙂

The thing is, I have an idea I really like, and I can see already great artists and great people working with me on that, bringing together their creativity and ideas!

Writing is part of it, so my inner self should be also satisfied.

It is so great to bring together a good team, it gives so much energy!

I just finished a draft and tomorrow I will see a few people to try it on them 🙂

Here is a song I found on you tube by chance, and I like to share it: “Top of the World”, The Carpenters

August 13- Love, friendship and what is in between (2)

Dear August,

As I rest for a few days at my parent’s home, between boredom, pleasure to see my family and high temperatures, I reflect on my recent experiences and try to make some sense. Alexandre, my 3 year and a half old godson, is a great source of inspiration.

Alexander met his recent love at the beach. It was a love at first sight and they became close in an instant. Despite his friend’s efforts to drown him and sand thrown in his eyes, nothing altered his feelings.

How long is this love going to last? Until he goes back home from holidays?

Do we fall in love that easily as we grow up? And when we do, when we keep this instinctive reaction can we trust our heart?

I have recently met a man with whom I have become great friends. Almost as easily as Alexandre did. It was during his holidays, and now he is back home. We talked for hours and hours. Is this a summer love, a friendship or something more?

The feeling of “meeting” someone, is so great! We find out that we share a common interest, something of value to both. If I love ice cream, and this person is an ice-cream flavor creator, it follows that I feel delighted to get to know him.Then we see that communication is easy.

If the meeting is brief, we don’t have the time to bother about our differences. When Alexander’s friend did something he didn’t like much, he decided to respond in the same way, but this was part of the game, and didn’t change at all his feelings. What do we do as grown ups regarding our differences?

Do we manage to create relationships after the first enthusiasm? Can feelings of love and friendship outlast our holidays?

April 29 – the star

My hometown visits usually make me compare past and present, reflect on what the future can be 🙂 I reblog one of my favorite posts of my former visit.

april4june6: A journal of self-tranformation

Dear April,

Today I had a meeting with a former literature professor at school, a big favorite, who also became a writer. He is now close to retirement from civil service, but his writing career continues.

It was great seeing him again!

We met at the café, and between two bites of croissant and a coffee, we managed to catch up for last year. He was advising me on publishing houses for my book. Another friend of his joined after a while, and he told her I was a “star” student, and continued being a star.

Now a “guest star” in my hometown and hopefully a star in Paris, I thought. In case Parisians haven’t realized it yet, I will help them open their eyes soon… 🙂

I also treated him as a rock star, when he explained that a student was harassing him and he had to hide in…

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July 17 – my night with the San Francisco ballet

July dear,

did you see me running on the streets of Paris towards the Châtelet theater? I was late, the bus didn’t follow its usual trajectory, the metro took long, and it was hot, hot, hot.

I got in with the “retardataires” the latecomers, until the entr’acte.We could watch and listen to the music, but we were behind a sort of glass. The artists couldn’t listen our applause.

It was wonderful, short scenes that stimulated the imagination … I didn’t read the program, so I made the craziest associations: a scene on the metro, musicals of the 50s, african and brazilian dances, couples in love, nature…

During the entr’acte I got my seat and chatted with some friends who were present, on their future holiday plans. J, a Turkish friend living in Paris, wanted to buy a ticket for Barcelona, on a weekend of March 2015. He incited us to do the same because the price was low. The Italian present, told him he doesn’t even know if he is going to be alive on that date. So what is the rush to book a weekend in almost a whole year? I objected that things might change in their personal lives and that we might need to count with other people too.

I told him that I plan other type of events -artistic projects- but I want to be more flexible on holidays.

As for our Italian friend, I don’t know if he is a pessimist.

Maybe he wants to invite serendipity.

J considered our reaction strange, a sign that we don’t want to project ourselves into a long-term future.

For me, it is a question of time perception, related to culture but also relationships and life. This perception can form a filter in everyday communication.

It is as if we communicated trough the glass , in the way the latecomers were separated from the main theater hall. In order to meet, we need to get to the other side.

And change our perspective.

July 14- Fireworks for July 14 celebration!

Dear July,

it is a national celebration today, of the French Revolution in 1789! It was the day the revolutionaries took hold of the prison of Bastille. Human Rights, Republic, and other such ideas are associated to this historic period : Freedom, Equality and Fraternity, still important objectives to remember! “Imagine all the people…”

And to celebrate, what is better than fireworks?

There is a parade in the morning, concerts and finally, at about 23.00, the fireworks!

On my side, I haven’t followed all the festivities because I woke up really late after an intensive week at the art exhibition center. And another intensive week to come for the event I am organizing in the South of France.

So I thought the proper way to celebrate is to take it easy, and went close to the Champ de Mars, where you have an excellent view of the Eiffel Tower, where the fireworks are fired from! In order to be in the right “ambiance”, with all the people – Parisans, people from other parts of France, military, and of course tourists – at the streets and the cafés. The weather was perfect, agreeable but not hot, so it was great to be out and enjoy.

I somehow felt optimistic: something good is coming, though I don’t know exactly what. I need to focus on what is important, and concentrate my energy in this direction. An objective is like a compass, we have to keep walking.

Some actions are like fireworks, others take time to mature. But they leave their marks.

In our unique style, we are here to make a difference with our presence.

14 juillet feu artifice Tour Eiffel multicolore, Paris © Groupe F - Thierry Nava

July 13- Last day at the Art Exhibition: to experience and to win

Dear July,

today has been a day full of all sorts of experiences at the art exhibition: should I talk about my feet that hurt again, -and it’s partly my fault: high heels :-)- or the human contact with all these artists?

I was running around all day, in meetings, photo-shootings, cocktail parties, it was great! I even got a present from a Japanese artist who was exposing her work. Something for the house she told me, it is so beautiful wrapt I don’t want to open up and see what it is… maybe some type of scent… Isn’t it great to get to a meaningful discussion with someone from a different culture in a lapse of time? And isn’t it funny to have communication difficulties with people who share the same background…

Anyway, these contacts are part of the wonderful side of the art world. I felt happy for having participated in the organization,  made new friends, and maybe this will help me in terms of career: when there is a good dynamic something should come out of it!

After the last cocktail of the day, I knew I wouldn’t be needed any more at the exhibition, so I said goodby and instead of going to rest, I decided to watch the end of the World Cup. The ambiance of the little café-bar next to my place was quiet a difference from the “ambiance” of the art exhibition.

People were cheering both sides, it was not clear if the majority was for Germany or Argentina. Personally, I was more sympathetic to Argentina, but I guess the German team played well.

In this type of games, there is a winner and a looser, nothing in between, even if the second team gets a silver medal. We get the impression that a moment could have a huge influence in people’s position. This is thrilling, and probably what makes people watch.

Is it like this in everyday life?

Are there different ways to experience and to win?



Champions Celebrating



July 1- Time Loop and Change: “Groundhog day”

Dear July, welcome!

I would like to make a deal with you: there are some important things I need to finish while you are here. Would you mind giving me a hand?

How? The weather for example. Not too hot to make us sleepy but agreeable enough to keep us in a good mood. And to stay outside, by the river bars.

Now, I have been wondering, after three months of blogging, if there is a change in my attitude, in the way I see the world.

There was a film, “Groundhog day”, released in 1993, with Bill Murray and Andy MacDowell. Murray incarnates Phil Connors, an arrogant TV weatherman who is sent by his channel to cover the annual Groundhog Day event in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. He considers the event beneath him and is odious with everybody. Bad weather obliges his team to spent the night there. When he wakes up the next morning, he finds himself in a time loop, and he keeps repeating the same day again and again. After some time, he knows exactly what is going to happen in every moment of the day, who he will meet and what they will say to him. He indulges in hedonism and then makes numerous suicide attempts but it is useless, he is still alive in this same day. He finally begins to re-examine his life and priorities. And this is the moment when he becomes “liberated” from this “spell”.

Now, the first time I watched this film, I was quiet young, and thought it was a nice comedy. The second time, I was older, and was going through some challenging times. I thought it was a psychological drama and found it disturbing. It was as if I were stuck in a time loop myself. Now I think of it as a philosophical tale.

My question is, have I changed my attitude, my world view and priorities during this period? My feelings about myself and others?

Groundhog Day (movie poster).jpg

June 30- Transformation Journal Update

Hello dear June and farewell,

I have promised to write for three months, April to June. Here is my starting point, at the beginning of April:

After having been insulted by a wannabe boss, I decided to change myself in order to get a real job and true love.

 April to June.

 In Paris where I actually live the last years”

A post a day. I succeeded to fulfill the promise to myself, even if, sometimes, I was one or two days late in finishing my posts.

Blogging, has been in itself a fulfilling experience. I shared feelings and instants of my everyday life. I took some distance from them and from myself.

Is there a result after three months soul-searching?

Yes. There is a tangible result, a miracle, I wrote about on June 27: I passed the first step of a selection for the funding of my project. This is great for me and unexpected!

Now, how about love April? You could ask me. Well, I have fallen in love! No, I don’t have a concrete “result” this time, but this feeling is already precious! I might have been fantasizing a little bit, but just a little and it was fun. It kept me in a good mood, so no matter what B does, he has been a source of inspiration for some time!

I have also realized that I love my life in Paris. I have had a lot of fun these three months and I am grateful for it 🙂

Before sharing these thoughts I might have had a tendency to focus on the difficulties to reach my goals. By writing something that is open to others, I focused on the things that could inspire me everyday. And enjoy more the journey.

Should I end this blog after this three month period?

At the beginning, I meant to share my thoughts only with two good friends.

But after a while, this blog became a platform that allowed me to meet new friends, wonderful people, and I have interacted with some of them.

Thank you so much for following, reading and helping me to transform!


P.S. I am not writing in this kind of diary, but it is very tempting!


June 9- The clock: time, space and relationships

Dear June,

the tempest came at night for the second time, after a day that was hot but also rainy and sunny.

I decided to take it easier and accompany my friends only to the Beaubourg Museum.

Just before entering, we had coffee with T, the friend I am hosting until tomorrow. We talked about life and relationsips. He told me he is alone after breaking up with a woman who wanted to have a family. He didn’t want children. For the last year he was having sex “occasionaly” with a colleague of his who lives in the States. It’s not a relationsip, he specified, he didn’t believe in long-distance relationships. It was more of a way to fill the void until another relationship came up.

I wondered if a non-relationship time is a void. And if you fill it in this way.

What I know for sure is that I wouldn’t make this choice for myself. If I am with someone, it is because I like this person and we create something together. He can be close or far. Feelings, in my case, is what it is all about.

After that we entered the Beaubourg, one of my favorite museums in Paris, and went to see part of “The Clock”. The 24 hour film that was distinguished at the Venice festival of 2011, by Christian Marclay. Extracts of films from different times and cultures, that show watches, time going by. We entered at 14.00, it was 14.00 screen-time also. After an hour and a half, I went out.

My friend T stayed in for hours. Maybe to fill in the time while waiting for something to happen.

I left after an hour and a half. It was impressive, but it was time to act in my own temporality. It is time to create my every-day contemporary art, simply by living 24 hours around the clock.

With people who mean a lot to me. Close and far.

June 8- Paris Museums 1: Grand Palais and Palais de Tokyo

Dear June

Sunday was a Museum day: my friend T arrived from Switzerland with a big list of art exhibitions that were a must to him: among them, the Grand Palais and the Palais de Tokyo. Two of the museums that host contemporary art exhibitions. He hardly left his suitcase, and we started running around the city.

I am usually lazy on Sundays. I like to take things easy. But there was no time to lose.

We started with Bill Viola, the video artist, at the Grand Palais: it was very impressive, the first time actually I was acquainted with his work: conceptual videos on life, death and transfiguration, that were like moving paintings. My friend was also interested in the second Grand Palais exhibition: the photographs of  Robert Mapplethorpe.

Next stop: Palais de Tokyo. We were to join other friends, there, and his colleague who was in Paris. To begin with, “Flamme Eternelle”, or Eternal Flame, by Thomas Hirschhorn who lives and works in Paris. Inspired also by contemporary political philosophers, he creates a space that is free and open to the public. So different from the other exhibition of the photograph Sugimoto.

This intensive visitation is not at all my style. I’d rather be slow with a work of art, a person, and a situation. And choose one at a time. I’d rather take all my time. That makes also a choice more important.

I left them with Sugimoto and went to the museum café. There is a beautiful terrace outside, between the Palais de Tokyo and the Musée d’Art Modern that overlooks the river, la Seine. There were some adolescents with their skates, occupying part of the museum terrace. Tourists taking photos: families, couples, friends, all ages, different origins. The light was beautiful, and the “bateau-mouches” were passing by. Another form of “contemporary art”, an installation were I was participating myself.