May 24th, 2015- On love crushes

Dear May,

how do we break through repetitive patterns in our life ? For example, having a crush for guys who are not available, or not into us or … or… or..? Girl-talk with two of my friends -who are almost single- brought up this question.

What is “almost single” or “almost” in a couple? Seing someone you are not exactly into, or not considering it a relationship but still having a lot of elements that would define a relationship. For example, you date this person often, and repeatedly in time. You have met each other’s friends.

On the other hand, you don’t consider yourself being in a relationship because you are not sure this is what you want; or the other person has made it clear this is not his definition of a relationship; or something in between. Or you don’t feel in love and you are just waiting for someone else to make your heart beat. Someone less normal maybe.

Now, the three of us agreed there is something dysfunctional about it. Friend no 1 is almost in a relationship with someone she almost likes but she is not sure this is the one. Friend no 2 is willing to fall in love but goes through an indifference period. No one she likes to be found. I go through an almost relationship and imaginary crush period.

Yesterday I met again my imaginary crush and asked myself why I blushed when the object of my attention came for the traditional greeting “bise”, or two kisses on the cheeks. Haven’t I had enough of this almost friendship? Isn’t it boring not to meet someone for real?

Dear May, please fix all this sentimental issues, summer is coming and lovely hearts need to find their right place!

9 thoughts on “May 24th, 2015- On love crushes

  1. When it comes to feelings of love there is no raional thinking or logic explanation. The heart speaks and the mind trys to understand. Two factors which never can get together. When it comes to love we should listen inside our heart – and only our heart. And it will tell us which way we go best. But….. it can take a long time until we understand our heart’s words.

      • The mind wants explanations immediately and desperately looks out for them… that’s why it takes so long until we are ready to silent and listen to our heart… repeated experienced… lol

  2. We all long for the moment our hearts and mind will pick someone and they pick us in return, till then it’s The Almosts and The Ones we can’t have.

  3. Well, the word “almost” doesn’t quite cut it does it?
    About the “bises”, though I find it a nice custom, (Kinda strange though that french males increasingly kiss each other. Happens with some of my old friends, not to mention brothers when I go back) So, back to “bises”, I’ve also always thought that Repetition kills the Action. Two bises mean less than half one full kiss. And count yourself lucky: in Paris it’s only two. In some provinces is three, other places it’s four. As a young man traveling in France I sometimes found myself blowing an air kiss thinking it was four but, no it was three! 🙂
    Anyway. Don’t settle for “almost”. Go for all!
    Bonne semaine

  4. You are right Brian, an “almost” is not a place to be, I guess it is a form of transition as an airport… I will go for “all”, something that feels like home 🙂

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