May 30- divorced fathers

Hello May,

Yes, I only sent a funding application at 2.00 in the morning. I know I could have done it earlier, but I preferred to go out with two old friends for a drink. One of them is a divorced father, with a two year old daughter. We all met during our studies, and each has taken a different path in life. But we still love each other and get together from time to time to catch up.

We were surprised to hear that his relationship ended so soon and that they are not in good terms. As an observer, I find it hard to believe that it is possible to separate so soon after the decision to have a child.

But this is also the case of B who has a 4 year old also adorable kid. Is it the change in their lives? Is it the responsibilities that put the relationship under pressure?

I have no idea, at least our friend couldn’t explain the reasons that brought them to it, other than the change in his wife’s personality from the moment she became a mother.

Since I haven’t been close to the couple, I have absolutely no opinion, and no idea how this change can affect a couple. After all, I only have my friend’s version. And the most important thing, if it is final, is to find the best way to communicate for their child’s sake.

On the other hand, the discussion put me into thoughts concerning B, the object of my affection. Is a divorced father a species ready for a new relationship? Or is he someone who is looking for some form of distraction? Is it a particular species, or each one has his own characteristics?

I have to admit anyway, that for me, B’s charm is related to his role as a father, and the way he cares for his child.

This is enough to make him attractive.

 

http://ckl.ehe.osu.edu/new-parents-project/

 

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2 thoughts on “May 30- divorced fathers

  1. Divorce is tricky. I lived through it from the child side. I think though that things have changed from my father’s generation and men are in general much more responsible and want relationships with their children. In my case my father was responsible to the point that we never saw him working two and three jobs to make ends meet. A relationship wasn’t really in the cards. But that’s a complicated long story.

    I have heard that some women really do have a drastic change of personality after birth. But I am not a doctor. I had a friend who had dated a divorce father…almost married him. But she wasn’t happy with the answer to the question of who would come first in his life after they married. He didn’t blink when he stated it would always be his child.

    Thanks for the follow of my fiction site. I follow few, but I will book mark your place and try to visit if you leave a comment.
    Continued success in all you do. Cheers, Jules

    • Dear Jules,

      thank you so much for sharing your experience and thoughts, they are very enlightening! I don’t know how things will go, but I know I wouldn’t like someone to ask me to choose between my passions and him and I hope to be able not to ask someone else. And with a child it should be stronger. Could it that after a certain age we have experiences or bonds that are very important to us and are part of our identity? I will go back to your blog and leave a comment, I liked it a lot.

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